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We are ready for the waiting to be over

I’ve neglected to post a proper adoption update here for awhile (nothing since our road trip in October), and kind of purposely so.

Friends, I’m not going to lie, things have been hard. Recently in church a lady heard me talking about our adoption and thought I was talking about our second one, because this journey has been so long. Nope, same adoption, some changes along the way, but it’s the same adoption (you can see our adoption timeline here).

Here’s the good news: our dossier is down in South Africa right now.

We’ve been here before. A year and a half ago we were in the waiting for a referral stage (with a different agency and country -until we found out some things that were not so good about both and we ended up leaving the agency), but back then the agency/country policy was for families to be put on a list and referrals were given out in order of dossiers received and I knew our time was still quite far in the future. South Africa is different. They put all their dossiers in a pool and when they have a child to refer they look at all the families and decide which family would be best for that child.

That means we could get a referral any day.

Unfortunately that means I wish and hope for it every single day. And every time the phone rings in the morning my heart skips a beat a little.

A couple of days ago the phone rang around noon and when I saw Govt of Sask on the call display my heart started pounding like you wouldn’t believe. It was just someone with the wrong number. Major letdown. Major emotional roller coaster.

I struggle with how much to share about this, I do believe adoption is a beautiful thing and I don’t want to scare anyone away who believes God is leading them down this path but I just know that it is by far the hardest thing we have ever done and we are so ready for the waiting to be over.

Just the other day Raeca started to cry because she didn’t have her brother or sister to play with (actually, she’s convinced herself that she’s getting a brother and a sister). She talks about them all.day.long. In the morning it’s: “my Daddy is going to work to make money so I can get a brother or sister”, when she grows out of clothes “let’s put them away for my brother or sister to wear”, when I ask her to clean up her toys “yeah, because we don’t want my brother or sister to choke on them”, when she’s sees Africa on a map “that’s where my brother or sister live”, when we sit down at supper “there is only one space for my brother but we need another one for my sister”, and when she prays before bed “thank you for my brother and sister” . . . it’s been hard on her too.

We are all so ready to bring him/her/them home and we would love your prayers while we continue to wait.

P.S. I’m linking up to the Faith & Fellowship Blog Hop today.

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26 Comments

  1. I feel your pain and can totally relate. We have been scheduled to start our pride training as the first part in our home study three times and three times now the class has been cancelled meaning we can’t do any other part in our home study until it is done. Our worker phoned the other day to let me know that it was cancelled and I just cried. It’s so hard to have delays when you are waiting for your baby to come home.

    1. Oh, that’s heart breaking! 🙁 I’ll be praying for you as you go through the journey and that you can do your PRIDE ASAP!

    1. Thank you so much Chloe! I know it’s only from people’s prayers that we’ve been able to stay sane thing long. 🙂 We really appreciate them.

  2. Love that book! I’ve often wished I could write a kids book and have it published. There are far too few good books for kids.

    The wait is hard. I can not imagine the ups and downs you guys have gone through. I totally know what it feels like when you see the number on your caller id. Hang in there! It will happen! Will be praying! Who knows…it could happen any time.

    1. Marie! You totally should write a book! There is such a need for good children’s books and you’ve got the education and experience for some great stories!!

  3. Oh, I can just imagine that the waiting is especially hard. But hopefully that “any day now” will TRULY be any day now. Your stories of how your daughter keeps talking and asking about her little brother or sister are heart-wrenching.

    1. Yes, we are always hoping that call is just around the corner! And you are right, hearing Raeca talk about having a sibling is probably the hardest part.

  4. I’m sure this waiting is so hard!!! I have 9 adopted siblings so I remember this time well! It’s such a blessing to know that we can rely on the Lord’s perfect timing! Thanks for linking up with the Faith and Fellowship blog hop. If you’d ever like to cohost feel free to email me at susannah.kellogg at gmail.com

    1. Wow, adopted 9 children?? I hardly have the patience for one adoption, let alone NINE! That’s so awesome! Maybe we’ll get there one day. 🙂

  5. Trusting that the Lord NEVER delays. His timing is perfect and there is purpose in each and every day while you wait! Believing while you are praying for your baby, God is doing 10,000 to answer that prayer!

    1. Thanks so much Caroline! I know when we get the chance to look back we’ll be able to see His hand in it and how His timing is perfect but in the thick of it that’s always hard to see, as I’m sure you know. I’ll be praying for you as well!

  6. Oh my….that’s so tough. The wait is hard, there is no doubt about that. I can’t imagine having a little one who is excited and tired of the watch and watching her grieve through the waiting process too. It’s amazing how much she can understand!

    1. I’m always amazed with how much she can understand and while it makes it harder in some ways it is nice to be able to share with her what we are doing and how her life will change in the (possibly near) future.

  7. this made me tear up. praying for you, friend. sweet little raeca is going to be a great big sister!

    1. We are all crazy emotional here these days so you aren’t the only one tearing up! Rae gets all emotional when she talks about her brother or sister and then I get all emotional telling her that it will be soon, and we just need to wait a little longer . . . I think this might be worse than pregnancy hormones!

  8. We bought that book for our first adoption, during the wait. Oh, the wait. From being there, I know there aren’t many words that don’t sound trite or cliche, except to remind you that God has something amazing planned for your family. Something so much greater than you could have ever imagined! (Found your blog today, sorry for the weird “first” comment… but I just wanted to hopefully offer some encouragement!)

  9. Having worked at a baby shelter for so long where our babes were adopted I am so thankful that you have been God lead to adopt from South Africa. I did want to share a quick story with you…several years ago, my then employer had us working a short week (cost saving) so instead of sitting around at home or walking around the malls I decided to volunteer an extra day but I wanted to help out on the adoption side as opposed to the nursery. I was blessed that they could use the extra hands for the longest time my Monday morning started with me filming adoptive parents meeting their babies for the first time. Needless to say I was often in tears…ok always in tears. It is a very special moment and the love that fills the room hits you like a ton of bricks. I was later asked to assist with some administration tasks and was able to sit in on when prospective parents are chosen based on their dossiers. Now, I realise not all adoption agencies work the same way and not all are God centered but during this meeting I witnessed the social workers pray before starting the meeting. Praying for God to lead their choices and for God to open their minds and hearts to hear His will for each child’s life. They would discuss each dossier with such warmth and excitement. Once they had decided on a match they would pray over the dossier and a photo of the baby.

    I hope that this serves as encouragement to you guys…..know that even though your dossier is thrown into a pool it is treated as precious and with so many prayers being raised up I am sure you are going to be blessed a stunning brother/sister or both!

    I cant wait to see what rainbow baby gets to call you mommy!!!

    1. Thank you for your words Lisa, I shared your comment with Jared . . . it is so nice to hear about “the other side”. To think about those out in South Africa who are put in the place to match us up with our child or children and to think of them praying about the perfect match, it is so amazing!

      1. I believe that while you wait with aching hearts and longing arms, God has placed volunteers like myself in your baby’s life…our arms will rock them to sleep, our feet will pace up and down to soothe, our voices will whisper sweet words, our hands will prepare bottles and change diapers, our lips will smile and our faces light up when we see them and our hearts will rejoice when we transfer their sweet selves from our arms to yours!!! And even long after they have forgotten us we will pray for them and their parents! Every day I pray for the babes who left “heart prints” in my life….they made me a better me!!!

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