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I’ve neglected to post a proper adoption update here for awhile (nothing since our road trip in October), and kind of purposely so.
Friends, I’m not going to lie, things have been hard. Recently in church a lady heard me talking about our adoption and thought I was talking about our second one, because this journey has been so long. Nope, same adoption, some changes along the way, but it’s the same adoption (you can see our adoption timeline here).
Here’s the good news: our dossier is down in South Africa right now.
We’ve been here before. A year and a half ago we were in the waiting for a referral stage (with a different agency and country -until we found out some things that were not so good about both and we ended up leaving the agency), but back then the agency/country policy was for families to be put on a list and referrals were given out in order of dossiers received and I knew our time was still quite far in the future. South Africa is different. They put all their dossiers in a pool and when they have a child to refer they look at all the families and decide which family would be best for that child.
That means we could get a referral any day.
Unfortunately that means I wish and hope for it every single day. And every time the phone rings in the morning my heart skips a beat a little.
A couple of days ago the phone rang around noon and when I saw Govt of Sask on the call display my heart started pounding like you wouldn’t believe. It was just someone with the wrong number. Major letdown. Major emotional roller coaster.
I struggle with how much to share about this, I do believe adoption is a beautiful thing and I don’t want to scare anyone away who believes God is leading them down this path but I just know that it is by far the hardest thing we have ever done and we are so ready for the waiting to be over.
Just the other day Raeca started to cry because she didn’t have her brother or sister to play with (actually, she’s convinced herself that she’s getting a brother and a sister). She talks about them all.day.long. In the morning it’s: “my Daddy is going to work to make money so I can get a brother or sister”, when she grows out of clothes “let’s put them away for my brother or sister to wear”, when I ask her to clean up her toys “yeah, because we don’t want my brother or sister to choke on them”, when she’s sees Africa on a map “that’s where my brother or sister live”, when we sit down at supper “there is only one space for my brother but we need another one for my sister”, and when she prays before bed “thank you for my brother and sister” . . . it’s been hard on her too.
We are all so ready to bring him/her/them home and we would love your prayers while we continue to wait.
P.S. I’m linking up to the Faith & Fellowship Blog Hop today.